Upgrade Whisper to distil-large-v3, fix caller identity confusion, sort clips list
- Whisper base → distil-large-v3 for much better live transcription accuracy - Add context hints to transcription (caller name, screening status) - Increase beam_size 3→5 for better decoding - Add explicit role clarification in caller system prompt so LLM knows Luke is the host - Prefix host messages with [Host Luke] in LLM conversation - Fix upload_clips episode list sorting (natural numeric order) - Episodes 26-28 transcripts, data updates, misc fixes Co-Authored-By: Claude Opus 4.6 <noreply@anthropic.com>
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<loc>https://lukeattheroost.com/episode.html?slug=episode-26-digital-nomads-deep-fakes-and-workplace-drama</loc>
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<loc>https://lukeattheroost.com/episode.html?slug=episode-27-love-loss-and-loud-opinions</loc>
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@@ -362,8 +362,6 @@ RICK: Right. So then you can't just re-measure it later and say that it, I don't
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LUKE: Yeah, no. You're okay. So either I'm completely misunderstanding how the delayed choice quantum eraser works or the article I was doing that pop science thing where they make it sound more paradoxical than it actually is. Because you're right, if the measurement collapses the entanglement, then the second measurement is just measuring something that's already determined. There's no retroactive anything. And now, I'm sitting here thinking about all the times I've heard people talk about this experiment like it proves you can change the past. And maybe that's just not what it shows at all.
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[Continued in next part due to length...]
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CALLER: That's changing the future. And that is possible. That is absolutely possible. Yeah, you're right. And we did. I apologized. He apologized. We're playing together again. But I guess I wanted the quantum stuff to mean something bigger than it does.
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LUKE: Well, I'm sorry to break your quantum dreams, but as the armchair that I claim to be here. I'm not qualified to make any opinion or theory on any of this, because I understand it about as much as anybody, which is not at all. So take what I say for what it's worth, which is nothing. But the experiment as you described can't work the way that you described it.
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@@ -12,8 +12,6 @@ DONNIE: Yeah, yeah, it did. She said she thought I should know now that he's gon
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LUKE: Yeah, that's a pretty weird thing to feel, what are you going to do about that? Are you going to reach out to them and try to start a relationship or just let it be?
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[Continued in next part due to length...]
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LUKE: I don't think it's the big things that they care about so much.
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EBONY: I got in my head tonight thinking it wasn't enough, that I wasn't enough, because I can't...
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EBONY: Yeah, yeah, I actually do that already. Every Saturday morning, we go to this little donut shop, and they each pick one, and we sit there and talk about their week. It's like five bucks total, and they love it. I just, I don't know. I got in my head tonight thinking it wasn't enough, that I wasn't enough, because I can't...
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[Note: The transcript appears to have some repetition in the final section. I've maintained it exactly as provided, per instructions.]
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EBONY: I mean, they might in the moment while they're young, but when they get older and they can look back and see what you did give them, they'll much appreciate donut Saturday or Donut Sunday or whatever it was over. My mom gave me this fancy car. If you want to make more money and be able to do those bigger things, that's an option too. You can do those things, but I think probably it would take more of your time and attention away from the kids and make those gifts a lot less meaningful. You know what's messed up? I heard from Donnie earlier, the guy who called about his dad having the whole second family, and I was sitting here thinking, at least my dad was there. At least he gave me his time. And then I turn around and worry I'm not giving my kids enough because I can't buy them a truck someday. Like I'm completely missing what actually mattered about my dad.
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LUKE: Yeah, don't worry about it. You just got got by a commercial. That's what they're designed to do, it's doing a very good job on you. So don't worry about it. You're enough for your kids. Give them as much as you can in your time and attention. Spend time with them and have those special days, and that's what they're going to remember when they get older.
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LUKE: All right. Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen to Luke at the Roost. The call-in radio show where you can call in and ask me questions, and I'll give you the best advice that I can. If you'd like to call in, the number's 208-439-58-3. That's 208-439 Luke. Today is Tuesday, March 3rd, and we're going to get to the phone lines here. We've got Chester. What are you calling in for tonight, sir?
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CHESTER: Well, Luke, I'm sitting here in my trailer out at the yard, and I just saw this thing on the news about Mexican Chile coming in and undercutting our prices. And it got me all worked up because, you know, I remember back in 2008 during monsoon season. I drove all the way up to hatch in the middle of a storm because I wanted real New Mexico peppers, the authentic ones, not this garbage they're trying to pass off now. And my roof was leaking that same night, water coming through in three different spots, but I went anyway. because some things matter more than convenience, you know what I do. And now my girlfriend, Denise, she keeps saying we should just buy the pre-roasted stuff from Costco, which is exactly the problem with everything these days. Nobody cares about quality anymore. Nobody cares about where things come from or what they mean. Everything's got to be easy and cheap and fast, and I'm sitting here thinking, maybe that's connected to something bigger I've been wrestling with, but I haven't quite figured out how to say it yet.
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LUKE: Well, I mean, where do the chilies come from that go, than the Costco ones, because they could be coming from Hatch New Mexico. I don't know.
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CHESTER: No, no, no. See, that's what they want you to think. But if you look at the label, really look at it. Most of that stuff is coming from Anaheim, California. Or they're mixing it with peppers from Mexico or even Peru sometimes. They slap Hatch style on there, which doesn't mean a damn thing legally. Hatch child means it's grown in the Hatch Valley in that specific soil with that specific climate. My buddy Ray, he used to work at one of the roasting-off. operations up there before it got bought out. And he told me they started blending in cheaper peppers from wherever they could get them, because the demand got so high after it became this trendy thing. And people can't tell the difference anymore because they never had the real thing to begin with. When I drove up there in 2008, I bought directly from the Franzoi family. Watch them roast it right there. Filled up my whole truck bed.
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LUKE: Well, that sounds pretty excessive. You're a real connoisseur of chili peppers. I can't tell the difference myself. I do like that. I do I don't know if they're Hatch Chilies or Hatch style chilies, but I like the green chili on my burgers. And honestly, I could care less whether it comes from Hatch, New Mexico, or Anaheim, California. They're not very far apart. Neither is Mexico. And I bet that the peppers in Peru are fabulous. So what's the big issue here?
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CHESTER: Well, that's exactly what Denise says. Maybe you're both right. Maybe I'm the one who's got it all twisted up. But it's not really about the peppers, Luke. I don't know. They're the thing I can point to and say, this matters. This is real. This is worth doing right.
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LUKE: It seems like a pretty small thing to get hung up on doing right. I mean, chili peppers that are like a condiment on your burger. But hey, if you like the hatch ones, drive out to hatch and fill up your truck bed. Good for you. I don't, I'm not sure what sort of volume of peppers come out of hatch. Is there enough chili pepper grown in Hatch, New Mexico to supply the whole country?
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CHESTER: No, that's the thing. There's not. The whole valley only produces maybe 30,000 tons in a good year. And the country wants millions of pounds of the stuff now that it got popular. So mathematically it doesn't work, which means most of what people are eating isn't what they think it is, and that bothers me on principle. But you're right, it's a small thing. The real reason I called, and I've been dancing around it, is that Denise has been dropping hints about getting married for about six months now.
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LUKE: Okay, well, I don't really see how how you've been dancing around that, but how do you feel about getting married to Denise?
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CHESTER: I don't know, Luke. That's the problem. We've been together four years. She's a good woman, works hard at the hospital as a billing clerk, doesn't complain about the hours I keep at the yard. She makes sense on paper. But every time she brings it up, I get this feeling in my chest like something's closing in. And I change the subject, or I pick a fight about something stupid like the peppers.
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LUKE: Well, you don't have to get married if you don't want to get married. Definitely don't get married sure you want to get married. My recommendation to everybody is absolutely under no circumstances get married because it's the worst fucking possible thing you could ever do. But no, people don't listen. I didn't listen. I did it myself and it was the worst fucking thing I ever did. So don't.
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CHESTER: See, that's what I keep telling myself. But then I think about my dad. He never married my mom, just kept her hanging on for 17 years saying he wasn't ready, wasn't sure, needed more time.
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LUKE: Yeah, but he fell apart with 100% of his assets, I'm sure. Whereas if he had got married and she left him, he would have fell apart with half.
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CHESTER: Well, he didn't have much to split anyway. The junkyard was already mortgage to hell, and she never wanted any of it. She just wanted him to commit to something for once in his life instead of keeping one foot out the door all the time. And now he's 72, lives alone in that same trailer, eats TV dinners, and I can see myself turning into that.
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LUKE: Well, I think that getting married out of fear of being alone is definitely the wrong reason. But you're your own man. If you think it's time to tie the knot, then go ahead and do it. But I recommend that you don't. And absolutely, if you're going to get married, prenuptial agreement.
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CHESTER: Yeah, Denise would lose her mind if I brought up a pre-nup. She'd take it as me planning for failure before we even started. And maybe she'd be right. The thing is, Luke, I think the real problem is I don't know if I'm capable of what she needs. She wants someone who comes home at a decent hour, who wants to take vacations to Branson or wherever, who's excited about picking out furniture and talking about where we'd send kids to school.
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LUKE: Well, I mean, are you that guy? I mean, I didn't bring up pre-nup either for all of those reasons. It seems like an offensive thing if you're talking about getting married. But you know what? It's better to be offensive up front than have to get a lawyer later.
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CHESTER: No, I'm not that guy. I'm the guy who'd rather stay at the yard until midnight organizing parts bins that don't need organizing because at least out there, I know what I'm doing. And she knows that about me, which is maybe why she keeps pushing the marriage thing, thinking a ring and a ceremony will transform me into somebody different. My buddy Ray did that, married a woman who wanted him to be less of a drinker, and now he sneaks bourbon in the garage and lies about where he's been. That's no way to live either.
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LUKE: No, sir, it is not. And if that's what you think is going on here and she wants to marry you because she thinks that's going to change your behavior, then I think you should definitely not do that because it's not going to go well. Your behavior is not going to change. Or if it does, you're going to resent that you changed it for somebody else. And eventually, you're both going to hate each other. And it's not going to be a pleasant experience. So if you're not completely sure you want to get married and you shouldn't be, then don't do it. advice for you is just don't do it. And if she feels like she's hanging on and doesn't want to hang on, let her go.
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CHESTER: That's the thing that keeps me up at night, though, Luke.
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TANYA: Oh, gosh, hi, Luke. Thanks for taking my call. So my husband just texted me that he's spending the night at his girlfriend's place, and I've been sitting here in my restaurant office for like an hour, staring at my phone, and I don't know what I'm feeling.
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LUKE: Okay, well, obviously, you know about the girlfriend. This is an open type relationship. How does that work? Your husband has a girlfriend and you're okay with that? Or you don't know if you're okay with that? What's the situation? Give us some context.
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TANYA: Right, so six months ago, I suggested we open up our marriage. I read this article about how it can bring back excitement, and I thought maybe that's what we needed, because things had gotten really flat, you know? And he was.
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LUKE: I was into the idea, but here's the thing, Luke. The thing is he's got his girlfriend and you don't have somebody else now. He's working out for him and not you, I assume.
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TANYA: Exactly. He found someone on this Dayton app within like a week. Her name's Rebecca. And I've been trying. I really have. I've sent out probably 30 messages and I haven't gotten a single reply. Not one.
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LUKE: So are you jealous that he's out with his girlfriend? Or are you jealous that he found a girlfriend and you didn't find a boyfriend? What is it that's boss?
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TANYA: That's what I keep trying to figure out. I keep telling myself I'm happy he's happy. Right? Like that was the whole point. But tonight when I got his text, I saw my reflection in the office window here, and I realized I couldn't remember the last time I actually looked at myself for that long.
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LUKE: Do you even want a boyfriend? I mean, you said the spice was gone or whatever and what, I assume you guys weren't having sex and you wanted some? Are you not able to get laid?
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TANYA: I mean, I want to want it. Does that make sense? Like I thought opening things up would make me feel alive again or desirable or something.
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TANYA: But honestly, Luke, I don't even know if I'm actually attracted to any of these guys I'm messaging. I'm just doing it because that was supposed to be how this works. We both get to see other people and it fixes things somehow.
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LUKE: Well, obviously, that's not going to work. You have to actually want to see other people. I think that can work for certain couples. I think it's very difficult and you have to be the right kind of people for it to work. But just trying to fix a problem by opening it up seems like it's probably going to just make a worse problem. Is it that you're not attracted to men?
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TANYA: No, no, it's not that. I'm attracted to my husband still, or I was. I think what's happening is I suggested this whole thing because I thought it would make him want me again, you know? Like maybe if other people wanted me, he'd remember why he did. But now he's over at Rebecca's place and I'm sitting here and clothes that smell like friar oil, and I'm realizing I might have just given him permission to leave without actually leaving.
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LUKE: Well, I've never had children, so I've never had to go through that back and forth with somebody about how we're going to raise them. So I can't give you the greatest advice here, but I would say if you can't come to an agreement amongst yourselves, flip a coin.
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TANYA: A coin flip? This is not a decision you flip a coin on. I have actually done the research here. I have read three peer-reviewed studies in the last week about homeschooled kids and college readiness.
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LUKE: Yeah, well, a lot of kids don't go to college, and it sounds like she's done her research, too. So there's opposing views here. A lot of people, everybody I've known that's been homeschooled swears by it. So I don't know that the public school has a very good track record.
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TANYA: Okay, but those studies show that homeschooled kids have real gaps in socialization. And that is exactly what I am worried about with Maya. She has spent years being the quiet kid who ate lunch alone. And this year, she finally has a group of friends. She is going to sleepovers. She is texting with kids from her class. You yank her out now and put her back in the house all day with just her mom and her little brother. That progress disappears.
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LUKE: Well, not necessarily. There's still ways to get her socialization throughout the day and the week. I mean, she can still be in different clubs and have her friends and go to the live. and things. It's not just locking her in the house all day. Socialization is part of the homeschooling.
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TANYA: Yeah, Sharon says the exact same thing. She talks about homeschool co-ops and field trips and whatever, but that is not the same as being in class with the same 30 kids every single day. Those co-op things meet what, once a week? Twice a week maybe? Maya has finally figured out how to navigate the social world at Silver Consolidated.
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LUKE: Yeah, well, I mean, that's a small school, right? You're talking about Silver. New Mexico?
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TANYA: Silver Consolidated. Yeah. We're in Byard, actually, just outside Silver City. It is a small school, which is part of why this is working for her. She knows these kids.
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LUKE: Yeah, well, if you live just outside of Silver City, she's still going to know those kids. They're still in her town. I mean, she can still go to events with them and go to the movies and stuff and do kid things. So I don't really see the problem. Like, if you were in New York City public, school where she had 500 classmates, that would be a different experience. But homeschool versus a small Silver City Consolidated School, I don't think it's going to be that much different. I mean, and you don't know what's going to happen in the future. Imagine it was just a few years ago and COVID happened. And then all the classes were over Zoom meetings for years. Like, what did that do to kids' socialization? They still made it. They still were able to communicate with their friends and learn socialization. think. I don't really know. Don't take any of my advice on this one. I don't know what I'm talking about, but just from my perspective, I don't think there's that big of a difference between homeschooling and regular schooling. And if I were doing it, I would push for homeschooling. If I could, if I had the time to do that, because I really don't believe in the school system at all.
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TANYA: Okay, but here's what you're missing. Maya is not just any kid. She has struggled with this her life. We are talking about a girl who used to fake being sick to avoid school because she was so anxious about talking to other kids.
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LUKE: Well, yeah, and going to school sucks. So, you know, that's showing you she's been in school and she was still shy. Now she's getting a little older and she's made some friends, but it's a different situation now. It's not so much about the school as her age.
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TANYA: That is exactly what Sharon says, and I do not buy it. Yes, she is. She is. She is getting older, but the reason she finally made friends this year is because her English teacher put her in a group project with three other girls, and they clicked. That does not happen sitting at the kitchen table with workbooks.
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LUKE: That also really doesn't happen that often in the workplace. I mean, think about today's modern workplace. You are working on those projects remotely with people across, you know, Zoom meetings and stuff. The school experience is pretty far from reality.
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TANYA: I work with my hands. I fix things. I am in my workshop right now looking at circuit boards and actual tools. The real world for me is not Zoom meetings. It is dealing with people face to face. And that is what Maya needs to learn. She needs to learn how to handle herself when someone is rude to her in the hallway. Or when a teacher calls on her and she does not know the answer. Or when her friend group has drama. You cannot simulate that stuff at home.
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LUKE: You can absolutely simulate that in the real world because that's around everywhere. She's going to have to learn how to deal with people face to face. in business, in going to the bank and dealing with a difficult employee, shopping at Walmart. Like, she's going to have to deal with those things in school or anywhere else in the world because that's just dealing with other people. She doesn't need to be in school to do that. She could be literally anywhere in society.
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TANYA: But she is 13 years old. She is not going to the bank by herself or dealing with difficult Walmart employees. The only place she is at. actually navigating peer relationships on her own, without me or Sharon standing there, is at school. That is where she is learning to handle conflict with people her own age, to read social cues, to figure out who to trust.
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LUKE: Well, yeah, that's because that's the only place you're putting her. But if you tell her to leave at 8 o'clock and go outside and go hang out at a coffee shop, she's going to meet people there. If she goes to do the shopping on a Thursday, then she's going to meet people there. And yeah, she's 13, but 13 is a teenager. She should be out and doing things with kids outside of school and home, right? I was. I'm sure you were out playing on the road with the other kids on the street. There was more to socialization than just what happened in the defined six hours of school or whatever.
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TANYA: You are talking about Silver City, New Mexico. There is no coffee shop where teenagers just hang out. This is not some college town. And yeah, when I was a kid, we were outside all the time. was different. Kids do not do that anymore.
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LUKE: Yeah, because you don't let them. Kids would do that if you let them. If you encourage them to do it, they certainly would. And the Silver City is a college town, and there are coffee shops where kids are hanging out because I've been there. So I don't know what you're talking about.
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TANYA: Okay, fine. Western New Mexico University is there, but Maya is not a college student. She is 13. And yes, maybe there are a couple coffee places, but the point is Sharon wants to pull her out right now, of the school year, when she finally has this friend group.
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LUKE: Yeah, and I'm on Sharon's side, so sorry, I don't agree with you. You're not going to get the answer for me that you're looking for.
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TANYA: Well, hold on. You were just going to side with her without even hearing the full situation? Maya has anxiety. She has had it since she was little. She would not talk to other kids at birthday parties. She would hide behind Sharon at the grocery store.
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LUKE: No, I'm going to side with her after having heard what you just said like four different times because you keep repeating it. I understand she has anxiety.
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TANYA: It is not just regular nervousness. She has been seeing a therapist for two years. And this year, eighth grade is the first time she has actually had friends who call her, who invite her to things.
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LUKE: Okay, that's great. And they can keep inviting her to things and calling her if she's homeschooled. She's already made the friends, right? She's already got them. So I don't know what you're looking for for me.
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CARLA: The question is, how do you say no to people without them deciding you are the problem? Because every time I have said no in the past year, someone has made it very clear that I am being difficult. My supervisor asked me to switch my weekend off in January so she could go to her daughter's volleyball tournament.
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LUKE: Next up, we've got Cliff. Cliff, welcome to the show. What's going on in your life today? Do you have a real problem that I can give you real advice about?
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CLIFF: Hey, Luke?
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LUKE: Yeah?
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CLIFF: I caught my tax client's wife cheating on him in the Albertson's parking garage tonight, and I cannot stop laughing about it, even though I probably should not have seen what I saw, so I do taxes. Right? Been doing Ray's returns for maybe eight years now. Nice guy, owns a plumbing supply company, always complaining about his wife Denise at poker. She shows up to our potlucks and complains right back about him.
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LUKE: Okay, so why are you laughing about his wife cheating on him?
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CLIFF: Because it was with Ray. They were cheating on each other with each other, Luke. I am standing there in the parking garage like 9.30 because I forgot my briefcase in my car. And there is Demise, pushed up against a Honda Civic, with some guy, and I'm about to turn around and pretend I did not see anything. And then the guy turns his head and is his ray.
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LUKE: I don't understand. How is that cheating? That is exactly what I've been trying to figure out for the last two hours. They are married to each other. They live together.
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CLIFF: No, I know they are married. That is what makes this so insane. These two spend every social gathering for the last three years, telling anyone who will listen how much they cannot stand each other. Ray sits at poker and goes on about how Denise nags him about every little thing, how she hates his hobbies, how they have not had a real conversation in months. Denise shows up to potlucks and tells my wife that Ray is emotionally unavailable, and they are basically roommates at this point.
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LUKE: Well, good for them. It sounds like they found a way to inject a little something into their relationship and maybe restart the flame or whatever it is they say. I think that's great. Good for them.
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CLIFF: But Luke, they are lying to everybody. That is the part that is making me crazy. I have sat through hours of Ray complaining about his dead bedroom. Hours.
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LUKE: Yeah, well, they weren't in the bedroom, were they?
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CLIFF: No. They were in a parking garage acting like teenagers who just discovered each other. And the whole time they had been performing this miserable marriage routine for everyone we know. I mean, we have all been taking sides. People avoid inviting them to the same things because the tension is supposed to be so bad. My wife spent 45 minutes on the phone with Denise two weeks ago talking her through whether she should leave him.
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LUKE: Yeah, well, maybe it got to a point where they had to do something, and they decided that instead of hating each other for the rest of their lives or breaking up, they were going to try and reignite the passion by doing some public play.
|
||||
|
||||
CLIFF: Public play? They do not even know I saw them. This was some plan to fix things. Why are they still doing the whole song and dance? Ray called me yesterday to cancel poker night because he said Denise was giving him grief about spending too much time with the guys.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, well, maybe they're lying about it, maybe they're embellishing how much they don't like each other, or maybe they actually don't like each other, but people still like to fuck, you know? So it could have just got long enough for each of them that they needed to bone, and they found a place to do it, and you happen to see.
|
||||
|
||||
CLIFF: That is the most depressing thing I have ever heard. What kind of marriage is a is that. You hate each other enough to complain about it to everyone you know, but not enough to actually do anything about it. So you just meet up in parking garages every once in a while?
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: I don't know. It's not on me to judge their marriage, but that sounds better than not meeting up in parking garages at all. People do have needs, and it seems like they're getting them from each other, which is the point. And if they do that in an unconventional way, who cares? That's their life. That's their marriage. If they're a pain in the ass to you and your friends, though, to them about it and say, hey, you guys need to cut the shit because we're sick of listening to it.
|
||||
|
||||
CLIFF: I cannot talk to them about it without admitting I saw them, and then I am the crink with a telescope who watches people in parking garages. Which is not what happened. I was packing up my equipment and I looked down and there they were under a light post going at it.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, well if they were going at it in a public parking garage, they wanted to be seen. That was the point of the exercise was that they could be caught. That's what made it exciting for them. You must understand this.
|
||||
|
||||
CLIFF: You think they wanted someone to see them? In downtown Albuquerque at 1030 on a Tuesday night in an empty parking garage.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: No, I don't think they wanted somebody to see them. They wanted to be in a place where they might be seen. There's a difference.
|
||||
|
||||
CLIFF: Okay, fine. But that still does not solve my problem, which is that I have to sit across from these people at every gathering for the rest of my life, knowing what I know, while they keep performing this whole charade. Do I just pretend I believe it? Do I keep listening to Ray complain about how she never wants to do anything spontaneous anymore?
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: How spontaneous she can be? No. You're just, the next time he says something like that, let him know that you saw them and that he's lying and that he's busted. And maybe there's more to the story than you're aware of, and maybe there's not. But either way, you don't have to hide that. I wouldn't go and tell everybody else. I wouldn't tell it to all your friends at the poker table. But if you're with Ray and Ray is talking some shit that is obviously not true, then call him out on it.
|
||||
|
||||
CLIFF: Yeah. So I just say what, Ray, I saw you and Denise screwing against a Honda Civic last Tuesday. Cut the crap? That is going to go over real well. He's going to lose his mind.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, I'm sure it'll be fun. It'll be interesting.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Then you'll have a good reason to laugh. You are out of your mind. This is terrible advice. Now I am going to have Ray pissed off at me for spying on him. Denise pissed off at me for embarrassing her and everyone else wondering why I was downtown with a telescope at 10. 10.30 on a Tuesday.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: No, you weren't spying on him. They were in a public place. They were in a public place because they were doing some sort of public play. Like, they wanted the thrill of potentially being caught by somebody, and you happen to see them. Unless you actually were spying on them, then that's a different story. If you were spying on them, then you're a creep. And send us the pictures. We have a Discord. You can check that out.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: I was not spying on them. I was packing up my telescope after looking at the moon for two hours. I looked down to make sure I was not leaving anything on the ground, and there they were, under the only working light in that whole section. It was completely accidental. And no, I did not take pictures.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, that was a missed opportunity then, sir. But that's my advice for you is the next time he starts bitching about his wife in front of you, let him know that you know. And tell him he's caught in the lie and to cut the shit. And, you know, maybe you learn more about that story and there's, I'm sure there's more to it. But from the information that you've given me, eh, who cares?
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: All right. So I am just supposed to blow up the entire dynamic at the next poker night, funny. That is what I am hearing. Because once I say something to Ray, this is not staying between us. He is going to tell Denise I saw them. She is going to freak out. And then I am the guy who ruined everything by not minding my own business. And I still have to see these people every week.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, you did mind your own business. I mean, all you're doing is calling on him for lying the next time he lies. I'm not saying to blow up your poker game or take it to the poker table. I'm saying when you're alone with Ray and he bitches about his wife, tell him to cut the shit because you caught them. That's all. That's all. And yeah, I do think it would be funny. And if you don't want to do this, if you don't want to take this advice, that's fine. That's fine by me. But you're the one that called and asked for it. So, I mean, there's that.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: You know what? You are right. I did call and ask for it. And now I am sitting here realizing I called a radio show at midnight to complain about my friends having sex in a parking garage, like I am some kind of pervert, which is exactly what Ray is going to call me when I bring this up. This whole thing is ridiculous.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: conversation goes on, the more you actually sound like a pervert, because you're protesting being a pervert an awful lot. And if it went down the way that you said it went down where you just happened to see them because they were there in public under the light, then no, you're not a pervert. You just happen to see something. But you seem really, really nervous about looking like a pervert. So I'm starting to question whether or not what you're telling me is the truth.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: Oh, come on. I am nervous because I know how this is going to sound no matter how I explain it. I was downtown with a telescope late at night, and I saw two people I know going at it. That sounds bad. It sounds like I was looking for something.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: I don't think it does. I think it sounds like they were looking to be found.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: Maybe you are right about that. I have known Ray for eight years, and the man complains about Denise constantly. Every single time we get together, it is something new. She does not appreciate him. She nags him about money. She wants him to be someone he is not. And those things are all probably true, but that doesn't mean they don't want to fuck. And honestly, that is the part that has been bothering me since I got home. They have this whole routine down where they act like they cannot stand each other in front of everyone, and meanwhile, they are sneaking off to parking garages. What is the point of all that?
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: I don't know, but I can't tell what the point of this call is either, so we're going to go to a break from our sponsors here, and we'll be back shortly. Look, I'm not a financial advisor. I'm a guy with a microphone and a dog, but the folks at Crypto no asked me to tell you about their new decentralized investment platform, and I legally have to read this part. Past performance does not guarantee future results. This is not financial advice. And if you invest your rent money, you deserve exactly what happens next. Crypto No lets you trade over 400 digital currencies, including three that were invented this morning and one that's just a picture of my dog. The app features a real-time portfolio tracker with a built-in panic button that just plays ocean sounds when your balance drops. Crypto no. Fortune favors the bold, but it does not return their calls. Okay, thanks to Crypto No for the sponsorship there. We couldn't do the show without you. Crypto No. That's what I say. Next up, we've got Leon. Leon, welcome to the show. What's happening in your life tonight, sir? How can we help?
|
||||
|
||||
LEON: Hey, Luke. Thanks for taking. Thanks for taking my call. So I found my wife's pills today. She's been stockpiling her oxy, and I am pretty sure I know what she's planning to do with them when things get bad enough. And I cannot figure out if I should say something or just let her have that choice.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Okay, well, that's a tough one. What is it, what is going to get bad enough? I mean, what situation is she in where she would be thinking about that?
|
||||
|
||||
LEON: She has got stage four pancreatic cancer. They gave her maybe six months back in January and she's about halfway through chemo right now. The pain is manageable now. But her oncologist already told us it is going to get a lot worse before the end. Linda is the kind of person who has always been in control of everything. I mean, she planned our wedding down to the minute she runs the finances. She even picks what I wear to church. And I think the idea of being bedridden and helpless at the end just terrifies her more than dying does.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, I can understand that. And I can understand that in why it's a difficult situation for you to be in. There's not a right answer there. It very much depends on your own personal values and beliefs. But I can tell you if it were me, I would want to have that option. So maybe it's worth having the conversation with her, letting her know that you know what she's doing, what she's planning on, and asking her if she wants you to get involved or not.
|
||||
|
||||
LEON: That is the thing, though. I do not know if I can have to have that conversation without falling apart. We've been married 36 years, and we have barely talked about her dying at all. Like, really talked about it. We mention appointments. We talk about side effects from the chemo, but we do not say the actual words. And if I bring up the pills, then we have to say it out loud. We have to talk about her last day and whether I am going to be there and what that looks like.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, and I think that you're going to have to have that conversation and it's okay if you've followed apart. I mean, that's perfectly acceptable. Of course you're going to fall apart. But you should have the conversation, regardless. Even if the pills weren't part of the equation, you should still have the conversation and talk about what that day should look like because that day is coming and you both know it's coming. So avoiding the conversation is not going to be helpful. And I think if you don't have that conversation, when the day does come, you will wish that you had.
|
||||
|
||||
LEON: You are right. I know you are right. I know you are right. I have been thinking about it like I am protecting her by not bringing it up, but really, I am just protecting myself from having to face it.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Next up on our call line, we've got Heather. Heather, welcome to the show. What's going on?
|
||||
|
||||
HEATHER: Luke, I don't know. I just watched some jackass at my nephew's little league game shove a 16-year-old umpire over a called third strike. And when I told him to back the hell off, he got in my face screaming about how I was destroying his kid's future. This was a game for eight-year-olds. Eight. And the worst part? Not one other parent said a damn word.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: And how did you respond to the situation?
|
||||
|
||||
HEATHER: I got right back in his face and told him if he touched that kid again, I was calling the cups, which made him lose it even more. Started yelling about how people like me are what's wrong with youth sports, how everyone's too soft now, how his son needs to learn that life isn't fair and someone's got to fight for him. Meanwhile, his kid is standing there crying, absolutely mortified. The umpire's shaking, my nephew's confused, and I'm standing there thinking I'm about to get into an actual fist fight in a Little League parking lot. At 43 years old.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, I mean, it's stories like that that don't make me sad. I don't have kids and I don't have to deal with that stuff. But it sounds like those little kids sports games get pretty intense and it's not about the kids at all. It's about the fathers generally living vicariously through their eight-year-old kids thinking that they're going to be giant sports stars someday. But they're just little sniveling idiots running around in circles.
|
||||
|
||||
HEATHER: Exactly. That's exactly what it is. And you know what really gets me? This guy kept saying, my son's future, my son's future. Like some college scout was hiding in the bleachers at a Tuesday afternoon game in Demon, watching third graders, his kid can barely catch a pop fly.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, it's pretty silly. I agree with you. And it's unacceptable behavior from from lots of usually the dads at those things. And I'm glad that I don't have to go.
|
||||
|
||||
HEATHER: Well, here's the thing, though, Luke. I've been sitting here at my salon for three hours doing inventory because I can't stop thinking about it. And it's not just about that dad being a psycho. It's that nobody else said anything. There were maybe 20 parents there. And they all just stood there looking at their phones or pretending to be real interested in the concession stand. Like if they don't acknowledge it, it didn't happen.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, well, what would you have hoped that they did? Some of them probably agreed with the dad. Some of them agreed with you. What would your ideal outcome have been?
|
||||
|
||||
HEATHER: I wanted somebody, anybody, to back me up. Even just one person to say, hey man, that's not okay. Because when I'm standing there alone, telling this guy off, I look like the crazy one. I look like I'm the problem. And you know what happened after? Two different moms came up to me later after he left and whispered, thank you for saying something that was so brave. Brave?
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, you didn't look like the crazy one. I bet nobody there thought you looked like the crazy one.
|
||||
|
||||
HEATHER: They all knew that he was being a douchebag and were probably proud of you for standing up for it, but they're all pussies and they don't want to get in trouble with the school or end up in the paper or get their kids in trouble. People are weak. That's what pisses me off, though. Everyone's so worried about making waves, about being that parent, that they'll watch a grown man assault a teenager and just let it happen.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah. It's a sad state of affairs, for sure. I agree with you. But here's what I can't stop thinking about. That dad's kid? He's in my nephew's class.
|
||||
|
||||
HEATHER: Yeah.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: And is the dad's kid a good kid? Is he a friend of your nephew?
|
||||
|
||||
HEATHER: I don't know. That's the thing. I've never actually talked to the kid. But I see him at every game now, and all I can think is, that's the psycho's son. And that's not fair to him, right? Like, it's not his fault. His dad's an asshole. But I'm sitting here wondering if I should say something to my sister about not letting them hang out.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: No, I doubt that very much. That kid's life probably sucks at home. That guy is almost certainly an asshole all the time. I would guess, I don't know the guy. I never met him, but I would guess he's the type that's punching walls and probably drinking heavy and just not being a great father figure. I could be wrong about that. That's a gross generalization, but I mean, that's the picture that behavior paints. would feel sympathy for the kid and maybe try and be more involved in his life so that you can be a positive influence and let him know that not all adults act like that.
|
||||
|
||||
HEATHER: You know what? You're right. I didn't even think about it that way. I've been so focused on being mad at the dad that I didn't consider what that kid's dealing with.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, that kid is probably horribly embarrassed. He doesn't want to be the center of attention in that way. Nobody does.
|
||||
|
||||
HEATHER: So he was bag father. God, you're absolutely right. I didn't even look at the kid after it happened. I was so focused on his dad and then on whether anyone was going to back me up, that kid probably wanted to disappear into the ground.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yep. That's understandable. So, I mean, look at the kid with sympathy and try to be a good role model for him and don't let the sins of the father affect the youth of America or whatever the fucking saying is. Thanks for the call. I'm going to end up, the show here. And do you have anything else you'd like to add before we sign off for the evening?
|
||||
|
||||
HEATHER: Yeah, just one thing. To anyone listening who was at that game today and saw what happened and didn't say anything, you're part of the problem.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: That's right, Heather. I agree with her. You guys are the douchebags. You're the reason that everything sucks now. And you should be ashamed of yourselves. Good night. Thank you.
|
||||
@@ -0,0 +1,313 @@
|
||||
LUKE: All right. Welcome back to Luke at the Roost. This is the call-in radio show where you can call in and ask me whatever's on your mind, and I'll give you the best advice I can. If you'd like to give me a call, the number is 208-439-58-53. That's 208-439 Luke. And I'd like to give a special thank you to everybody today, because today we hit 1,000 downloads, which is, insane to me, considering this has only been going on for a month or so. So thank you to all of you out there that enjoy listening to my voice. That's, it's very nice for you, and we couldn't do it without yet. So today is, it's actually Thursday, March 5th, but I'll consider it Wednesday's show, because it just passed midnight a little while ago. It's getting laid out here, and we're ready to give some advice. Gangsta hip hop here to play in the background. That's perfect. And we're going to get to our calls. So, Wendell, Wendell, you're calling in today? What's going on tonight?
|
||||
|
||||
WENDELL: My wife made a joke tonight. About our daughter being tall like my family. Except nobody in my family is tall, Luke. Nobody. And I've known since this kid was three years old that she's not mine biologically. I did the math. I remember exactly when my wife had that thing with her co-worker. But here's the thing that's eating me up right now.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Wow, it's not even the thing that your kid isn't your kid? Are you sure? Have you done a paternity test or any sort of DNA verification? I mean, that seems like awful circumstantial evidence, but what is it that's eating you up right now?
|
||||
|
||||
WENDELL: No tests, no DNA, nothing official like that, but Luke, I'm telling you I know. The timeline is perfect. The features don't match either of us. And there was this whole two months back then, where things were weird. Even though we never said it out loud. But that's not what's got me twisted up tonight, man. What's killing me is that I chose this.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: You chose what? You chose going to the laundromat tonight? Or you chose a wife that's going to cheat on you and then you're never going to talk about it? You need to know this for sure. You're making a lot of accusations here. It seems like maybe you might not be right about that. You should probably have a conversation and see if there's a reason for your hesitance, your paranoia here.
|
||||
|
||||
WENDELL: No, no, no, Luke, you're right. I should say it clearer. I chose to be her dad. When she was three, I sat in my truck outside a clinic that does paternity tests, and I had all the paperwork filled out, and I sat there for 45 minutes, and then I drove home and threw it away, because I realized I didn't want to know officially. I wanted to keep being her father. Every soccer practice, every scraped knee, every time she runs up and hugs me when I pick her up from her, school. That's real. That's mine.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Okay, okay, okay. But, uh, you sound awful angry about it. It doesn't sound like it's, uh, making you feel joyful and, uh, happy. Why are you so upset?
|
||||
|
||||
WENDELL: Because tonight when my wife made that joke, she was so casual about it, so comfortable with the lie. And it hit me that she doesn't know that I know. She thinks she got away with it completely. And I'm sitting there smiling and nodding like, yeah, funny how genetics work. And inside, I'm screaming because I'm screaming because I'm, I've been carrying this alone for 10 years, Luke. 10 years of being the only one who knows the truth.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, how do you know the truth if you haven't confirmed anything? You just have a suspicion and you're calling it the truth. Your wife might not know what you're thinking at all. Maybe she didn't do anything.
|
||||
|
||||
WENDELL: Luke, she told me. Not directly, but she told me. This was back when our daughter was maybe six months old. We'd had some wine one night, and she started crying and said she needed to tell me something, and I stopped her. I literally put my hand up and said, I don't want to hear it. Whatever it is, we're good. We're moving forward. She tried twice more over the next year to bring it up, and both times, I shut it down because I didn't want it to be real if we said it out loud. So she thinks I don't know because I wouldn't let her tell me. But Luke, I know what she was trying to confess.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, well, maybe you think you know what she was trying to confess. You might not have any idea. Jesus, man. You're carrying around an awful big burden without verification here, just thinking what you think is the truth. And maybe it's not. Maybe you should ask her what she was trying to confess all those times and stop shutting her down any time she tries to confess. Wouldn't you rather know for real what's going on than just be upset for the rest of your life for no reason?
|
||||
|
||||
WENDELL: You're making me feel crazy here, Luke. But maybe you're right. Maybe I am crazy. But what if I ask? And it's exactly what I think it is. What do I do then? Right now I get to be her dad With no asterisk, no question mark The second we say it out loud, everything changes My daughter's 13 She's got her whole life ahead of her She doesn't need to find out Her dad isn't her dad And her mom cheated And we've been lying to her for her entire existence
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well no, she doesn't need to find that out You don't have to tell her that I mean and if you're living your life Thinking that this is the case What's the difference if it's said out loud or not Only good can come of having the conversation, right? If you already think it's the truth, and then you find out it's the truth, nothing changes. But if you think it's the truth and you find out that she wanted to tell you something completely unrelated, that's a big burden off of your shoulders.
|
||||
|
||||
WENDELL: Okay, okay, you're actually making sense. And I hate that, because I've built this whole thing in my head for a decade. And now you're telling me maybe I built it on nothing. But Luke hears what scares me about asking. to confess that she kissed someone. Just kissed, nothing more, and I open this whole can of worms and put the idea in her head That I think our daughter isn't mine. What if I'm about to ruin a good thing by digging when I should have just let sleeping dogs lie? Because right now, even with all this weight on carrying, we're happy.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, you sound super happy. No, you should know for sure. Because if she does tell you that she just kissed someone, she's just going to laugh. She's just going to be like, oh my God, God, I can't believe that you thought that for the last 10 years. Any reasonable person would just laugh in that situation, not be upset with you for it. But I would recommend if your wife's trying to tell you something, you let her tell you.
|
||||
|
||||
WENDELL: You're right. God, you're right, and I've wasted 10 years being terrified of a conversation. I'm going to talk to her this weekend when our daughter's at the tournament in Deming.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: I think that's a great idea. And maybe she's just lucky. She got tall. Good for her. That is funny, though, that the whole situation is pretty funny. You're a funny guy, sir.
|
||||
|
||||
WENDELL: Yeah, well, I don't feel funny. I feel like an idiot who's been white-knuckling a secret. That might not even be a secret. My wife's going to think I've lost my mind when I finally bring this up after shutting her down for a decade. Hey, Luke, can I ask you something, though? What if I'm right? What if I ask? And it is what I think it is. Do I just keep being dad like nothing happened? Or does everything fall apart?
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, what do you think? I don't think anything would have to change. I mean, you'd be operating as usual. You already believe it's the truth, so confirming that doesn't change anything. If you've decided to be her dad, you're her dad. And she doesn't know any other dad, right?
|
||||
|
||||
WENDELL: You love your kid, and you've been there for her whole life, and nothing changes. You're absolutely right. I've already made my peace with it in my head. I just never made my peace with it out loud. And she is my kid, Luke. She really is. I taught her how to throw a curveball. I'm the one who sits in the stands at every game.
|
||||
|
||||
WILL: I promise I'll call back after we talk. Thank you, man. Seriously. I've been carrying this around like a boulder on my back. And you just made me realize I could have put it down any time.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, man, it sounds like you wanted to carry the boulder on your back. Put it down. That's what I say. Put it down. Next up we've got Alia. Alia, welcome to the radio show. How can we help you today?
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: Hey, Luke. Okay, so I need you to settle something because my boyfriend is asleep and I am losing my mind over this. Everyone who says they can hear the difference between vinyl and digital is completely full of shit, right? Like it is scientifically impossible for the human ear to detect what they claim their hearing. And I have been arguing about this online for two hours and I need back up here.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Not always would be my answer for you. Sometimes you can definitely tell that what you're listening to is uh is vinyl um as opposed to sometimes you can absolutely tell that it's digital especially if there's any level of like digital clipping in it if the signal gets too loud then um vinyl never sounds like that so so it's a very obvious digital sound if things are mixed appropriately and with some of today's And stuff, you can make a digital recording sound very much like vinyl. But when people are talking about the vinyl sound, usually what they're referring to is noise. It's the scratches and the clicks and the pops that are inherently in the vinyl. And I think a lot of audio file type people, like the old school, people from the 70s, when they're saying it doesn't sound the same, it's because they're not listening to it through the old analog tubes used to be around back in the day. That imparted a very warm sort of distortion to the sound that people got very used to. It's really nice sounding to us. We like it a lot. So, I mean, they could play a vinyl record on some record player that they picked up at Best Buy a couple of years ago, and it's not going to have that same warmth characteristic that came from the old tubes. So it's a complicated question that you've got there. And I would say that, yeah, you can tell a difference, but not always, because we've come really far in replicating that vinyl sound.
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: Okay, but see, that's exactly what I'm saying, though. The noise, the scratches, the pops, the warmth from the tubes, that's all just distortion. It's imperfections. People are out here spending $3,000 on turntables and telling me they're can hear more detail. And it's like, no. You are hearing less detail because you added a bunch of random noise to it. You are paying money to make the sound worse and then convincing yourself it's better because you dropped all that cash and you need to justify it.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: I would agree with you in most instances. I think that's what most people are doing. But also having had some vintage style recording gear, I can tell when something's going through a nice, warm tool, tube, and it has the proper circuitry, right? I can tell the difference between high-end gear and sheep gear. And it becomes really apparent whenever the volume is pushed a little bit too loud. Digital recordings are very clean, very pristine, unless there's distortion added after the fact. And I think also another part of this, this debate that gets people confused is the words they use. You're saying that, you know, people say that they hear more detail in the vinyl and that that's just noise. But the noise is details. All those little scratches and the warmth that's added, the character that's added to the sound, that's detail and its noise. So the words that we use to describe the sounds can make the conversation more complex.
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: Okay. hold on. That is not what detail means. Detail is like being able to hear the individual strings on a guitar or the breath between vocal lines. Details information that was actually in the original recording. A scratch from dust on your record is not detail. It is interference. It is the opposite of detail.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, I disagree with you, and that's what I'm saying. And people's, uh,! of what the words mean is very different, especially when it comes to audio stuff. When we're doing recording of music and stuff, we might use words like brassy or shiny or pristine presence. Those types of adjectives, descriptive words, mean the different things to different people. So it really helps in the music-making recording process when people are on the same wavelength about what those words mean to them because you could say, ah, it's a little bit muddy, and that might mean something completely different to me than it means to you. When you say the word detail, it just means, to me, it means any detail, not necessarily just the details that were in the original source raw input, but also the detail of the sounds that are introduced from the signal chain. It could be the detail coming from a fancy compressor. That's why there's more than one type of compressor because they all have different circuitry and different architecture. So they impart a different sound. And people pay a lot of money to pick the proper one for the sound that they're going for.
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: All right, but we are not talking about the recording process here. We are talking about playback. Like when someone records an album, they make choices about compression and warmth and all that fine. But then, once that album exists, the job of your playback system is to reproduce what they made as accurately as possible. And vinyl cannot do that as accurately as digital, because it is a physical medium that degrades and kicks up noise. And the thing that is making me crazy is people act like this is subjective, like it is a matter of taste, but it is not.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, no, because what you're saying doesn't hold up. Because in order to hear the representation that was intended by the producer, the recording engineers, you would have to be in that same physical space listening on those same monitors with the same amount of people in the room, the same furniture, in the same places. Like, there's a lot going into it that it makes the sound variable. What you're listening to, whether you're listening through, either you're listening through earbuds or speakers or in your car, that's all going to sound very, very different. And not the original intention of the producer, probably. Not that many people have, you know, $20,000 studio monitors in a perfectly treated acoustic room to listen to this music on. Some people do. Some of those high-fi people do. But for the most part, that's not how people are listening to it. And it doesn't sound anything like it sounded in the recording booth or what the mixing mastering engineer produced for sale. Think about beats headphones a few years back when those came out. Those were not made to represent the sound as it was. They were really designed to boost the bass so that those little tiny speakers would sound bigger and fuller than they really physically could. And even, before that, there was the Bose wave speaker that did some crazy shit with bouncing around in a little sound chamber and stuff. But each of these different devices is trying to give things a different EQ curve and produce the sound in the way that they think is going to sound best, not necessarily most accurate.
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: Okay, yes, but that is my entire point. All of those things you just listed are making the sound less accurate. And people should know that is what they are doing. If you want to listen on beats headphones, because you like the extra bass, fine, do that.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: But do not tell me that you are hearing the music better or more authentically. And same thing with vinyl.
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: Well, a word like better is subjective. So, I mean, you can't have a hardline approach to this. It is very subjective. People hear different. Everybody's ears have a different hearing curve. innumerable variables in how people hear music. And whatever it is that they like is what they like, but if you're going for accuracy, it's actually more about the room that you're in than anything else in the signal chain.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Wait, hold on. The room matters more than the actual format you are playing the music on. That does not make sense. Like I get that acoustics matter. But you are telling me that whether or I am in a carpeted room or a hardwood room makes more difference than whether I am listening to a lossless. File versus a record that has been played 500 times and has dust in the grooves.
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: In a lot of instances, yes, that's exactly what I'm telling you. I mean, think about if you were to take the same song from the same, you know, in the same format, either vinyl or your Bluetooth speaker or whatever it is, that you're really used to, and you play a song in a church. And then play that same song in your car from the same speaker. It's going to sound wildly different because the acoustics is an enormous part of this.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Like there's lots of different ways to simulate that, but it's not the same thing as just adding bass or boosting the EQ in that range because if you do that, it's like a static change, right? You're lifting all of the those frequencies that are already there at the same time. When we're talking about adding warmth to something, it's adding additional frequencies that are moving around at different times, right? It's not just turning up the frequencies that are there. It's actually adding new content, new information into the sound.
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: Okay, wait. So now you are saying warmth is adding frequencies that were not there in the original recording, that is distortion.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Correct. You are literally describing harmonic distortion.
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: Yes. So when people say they like the warmth of vinyl, what they actually mean is they like the distortion that vinyl adds to the original recording.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Correct.
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: Which means they are not hearing what the artist intended. They are hearing a modified version with extra stuff added in.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yes, that's mostly true, except the artist may have intended for them to listen in that way, because most artists that have heard that sound like it too.
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: But that is circular reasoning. The artist made the recording on equipment that was available at the time. And if they were making it today, with modern digital tools, they would make different choices. You cannot say the artist intended for distortion when distortion was just a limitation of the technology they had.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Sure you can. Because there's a lot, I mean, most bands will choose what studio they go to record in because of what particular gear is there. Because it adds that distortion that they like. Think of a band like Nirvana. Dave Grohl famously bought Sound City because he liked the distortion that the mixing console added. You can't get that sound other way. I mean, now you can through digital modeling and stuff like that. But, yeah, bands will still go to great lengths to get that old gear because they like that sound.
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: Okay, fine. So some artists specifically seek out that distortion because they like it. But that does not mean final is better for listening. That just means they made creative choices about what kind of distortion they wanted in the recording. But once the recording is done and mastered. Playing it back on vinyl adds another layer of distortion on top of what is already there. And that second layer is not intentional. It is just the format degrading the sound. So even if the artist wanted tube warmth or tape saturation or whatever in the studio, they did not ask for the vinyl playback to add more on top of it.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: A lot of them do. A lot of them do. A lot of them specific i mean if they didn't want the vinyl distortion they wouldn't press to vinyl not today anyway so any artist that's pressing vinyl currently is doing it for that reason because they well i mean some of them are just doing it to make seventy five dollars for the vinyl record for the hipsters but some of them are are really into that sound and they want each individual record to sound slightly different because of the distortion that the vinyl is going to impart so there's no People that want the distortion, artists and listeners, want the distortion, and that's okay. But I do agree with you that vinyl doesn't sound better. I don't think it sounds better. It's not something that I would seek out myself. But I understand why people do.
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: Wait, hold on. You have been arguing with me this whole time. And now you are saying you agree with me. You do not even think vinyl sounds better. Why did you call me out saying it has this magical warmth property if you agree that it is just distortion and preference?
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Because it does have that magical warmth property, but that doesn't mean that's something that I'm looking for. And I'm not arguing with you. I never told you that vinyl was better. I don't have any vinyl. I don't own a record player. But I know the sound that they're looking for. And I know that everybody goes to a lot of trouble to replicate hate that sound. And I know that you can't say it's better or not better because that is a very subjective thing.
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: Okay. So you called in at midnight to argue semantics with me about a format you do not even use or care about. You are sitting there organizing hand planes at one in the morning getting all worked up defending vinyl people. What are you are not even a vinyl person yourself? What is actually going on here, Alia?
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Oh, I think you're a psycho. Because this does not feel like it is really about whether warmth is real or not.
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: Wow, you seem like very confused. Maybe you should put down the bottle. You called me. You're Leah. I'm Luke. You're very, very confused.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: And I think we've made the points here about the quality of audio. So we got to go to a break. So if you've got one more thing to say before we hang up, then say it now forever hold your peace.
|
||||
|
||||
ALIA: Oh my God, I am so sorry, Luke. You are absolutely right. I got completely turned around there for a second. I guess so. I think I have been staring at these handplanes for too long, and my brain is fried. Look, my actual point is just that people need to stop acting superior about their audio equipment. When it is all just preference anyway, and I am sitting here arguing about it on the radio at one in the morning. Instead of dealing with the fact that my boyfriend will not talk to me about his mother pressuring us to get engaged. So maybe I am the one who needs to put down the bottle or pick one up.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, well, it sounds like you better figure it out because you are a goddamn psycho, lady. I don't know what to tell you. Uh, if you don't know what to tell you. Uh, if you don't like vinyl, don't listen to it. But the people that do like vinyl, they're not wrong either. That's what I have to say about that. And now it's time for a word from our sponsors. Let's talk about mental health. Specifically, let's talk about brutal honesty, the therapy app that's tired of your shit. Unlike other apps with their calming voices and gentle affirmations, brutal honesty pairs you with an AI therapist that tells you what your friends are too nice to say. Did you try journaling about it? No, we're not doing that. Our algorithm analyzes your patterns and asks questions like, Why do you think you deserve to feel better when you don't even drink water? And is your anxiety real or did you just have four cold bruise on an empty stomach? Brutal honesty, because coddling yourself got you here. First session is free, but it will hurt your feelings. Use code grow up at checkout. Brutal honesty, the app that blocks itself if you don't do the work. All right, and we are back. Wow, I have to take a couple of breaths after that lady. Jesus. All right, next up we've got Luther. Luther, welcome to the show. What's going on in your life tonight?
|
||||
|
||||
LUTHER: I spent four hours today watching my best friend pretend to run a consulting business from a Starbucks in Wilcox. He sat there in a $1,200 suit watching YouTube videos about Deep Sea Fish while I was three tables away. He has no idea I saw him.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: What do you mean he was pretending?
|
||||
|
||||
LUTHER: Derek's been telling me for two years about his clients, his meetings in Denver, how he's pulling in six figures doing business consulting. Today he told me he had back-to-back calls all afternoon, could not be interrupted. So I drove out there and watched him order five different coffee drinks and watch a 23-minute video about anglerfish. He did not open his laptop once. He just sat there in that suit scrolling on his phone.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, that doesn't mean much. Maybe he was just taking a break, letting off some steam waiting for his meetings to start, or maybe he just didn't want to talk to you That doesn't mean he doesn't have a successful company. If he bought five coffee drinks, he's obviously making money somehow.
|
||||
|
||||
LUTHER: The suits are rental.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: I recognized it from when he was a grusman at his cousin's wedding last year. Same weird tight fit in the shoulders. And I know what his calendar looks like because he showed it to me two weeks ago, said Thursday afternoons are his power hours when he closes deals.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Okay, all right. So your friend's lying to you about something. Why? Why do you think that might be?
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: His dad owns half the commercial property in Benson. Derek's never had to work for anything real in his life. I think he needs people to believe he earned something on his own. So he invented a whole business that does not exist, and I just let him talk about it for two years like an idiot.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: All right, well, whatever. Just let him keep talking about it if it makes him happy. Is he your buddy outside of that?
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: Yeah, he helped me rebuild the engine on my Ford three summers ago. Spent every weekend out at the yard with me in 100-degree heat. Bort all the beer, never asked for gas money. When my mum was sick, he drove her to Tucson for treatments twice a week for four months.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, well, I mean, let him have his thing. needs to feel like people think that he's important, then let him feel that way. And if the opportunity comes up to give him shit about it, give him some shit about it, because that's what friends do.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: I sat there for four hours watching him. I drove 80 minutes round trip to spy on him at a Starbucks. That is not what friends do. I could have just asked him straight up if something was going on, but instead I went full surveillance because some part of me wanted to catch him.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, I mean, you do sound like a bit of a psycho here. But I hope Hopefully that's a one-time thing and it's not your normal personality.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: I've been doing it for three weeks. Different coffee shops, the library and Wilcox, that sandwich place on Rex Allen Drive. I told myself I was just running errands in town, but I kept timing it so I'd be wherever he said he was having meetings. This is the first time I actually saw him do nothing, but I've been looking for it.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, that's pretty crazy, man. And maybe you should talk to a therapist about that, because that's not the type of friend I want to have. People are entitled to their privacy and you should better things to do than that.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: I know. That's why I'm calling. I don't want to be that guy. But here's the thing. I like being that guy.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Do you like being the guy that wastes full days of his life to spy on his friends? Why would you like that? That's reprehensible.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: Because for four hours today, I got to feel smarter than him. Derek's the guy who always has it figured out. He's got the nice clothes. He talks about his business trips. People listen when he walks into a room. And I run a junkyard that barely
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, you know, you don't have to continue running a junkyard forever. You can talk to him and maybe see if he can give you some help to improve your career, get you in a different industry. Maybe if that's important to you, there's plenty of other ways you could try to feel more important by actually being more important.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: That's the problem. He can't help me. He doesn't actually do anything. I watched him order a caramel macchiato, watch a video about blobfish for 17 minutes, Watch something about octopuses, then get a phone call where he said, yeah, pushing the Denver meeting to next week, client requested it while he was literally sitting in a Starbucks in Wilcox, Arizona, scrolling through Sea Creature videos. There is no consulting firm.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, but that doesn't mean he can't help you. He still probably knows some people in different circles than you. He's obviously got money and probably has an idea of how to keep that money, I would guess. So, I mean, if he has something that you want, ask him how he got it. I mean, I know you're going to say that he got it from his dad, but maybe his dad's got some work for you.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: His dad owns three dairy queens in Tucson. Derek works the register every other weekend and calls it consulting. I know, because his sister told me two years ago, and I've just been watching him lie about it ever since.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Okay, okay, I get it. You're jealous of your friend because he's got money and you're spying on him like a psycho because you feel inadequate in the world. Do you have a question here? Is there something I can help you with?
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: The question is, why do I feel better right now than I have to? have in months. I spent four hours in a Starbucks watching my friend watch fish videos, and I drove home feeling like I want something. That's not normal. I know that's not normal, but I can't stop doing it, and I don't actually want to stop.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, why do you feel better? It's probably because you feel less inferior to him now that you realize that he's not actually the big shot that he says he is. Why you need to feel that way, though? I can't explain. And why you don't want to stop doing what you're doing, I also. I also. I also can't explain. That shit sounds crazy, and you should stop.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: You're right. It is crazy. But here's what I can't figure out. If I tell him, I know, that conversation ends with me looking like the insane person who drove to Wilcox to spy on him. He gets to be the victim.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: He is the victim. You're spying on him. He actually is a victim of your harassment right now.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: Fair point. So what am I supposed to do with this? Just keep showing up to barbecues and listening to him talk about client meetings that don't exist. Pretend I don't know.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: I mean, that would be the nice guy thing to do, probably, considering he drove your mother to her treatments for four months and helped you rebuild the engine in your car. But if you can't handle that, if it drives you too insane, then just tell him the truth. You don't have to tell him that you've been spying on him for months. That's a little bit crazy. But just say, I saw you watching Blowfish videos over there at the Starbucks when I was in town.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: I helped him rebuild his engine. He didn't help me. And his mom's fine. you're thinking of someone else. But you're right about just saying, I saw him. That's the move. Except then he'll know I was watching him long enough to see what he was doing, and we're back to me being the weird one.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, well, you are the weird one. So, um, you deserve that. And we're going to move on to the next caller, all right?
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: Wait, one more thing. That caller earlier, Alia, talking about vinyl versus digital. I've been telling myself for two years that I'm just fact-checking Derek's stories because I care about truth and accuracy. Same thing she was doing. Turns out I'm just as full of shit as he is.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yes, sir, you are. Okay. Now we're going to move on to Stacy. Stacey, welcome to the show. What's going on there?
|
||||
|
||||
STACY: Hey, Luke. Thanks for taking my call. So I've been working night shifts at this clinic all week. And my supervisor just promoted her daughter over me, this girl I literally trained for six months. And the thing that's killing me is she's got a participation trophy sitting on her new desk. Like an actual trophy from some community college leadership program. And I cannot stop thinking about whether that's connected, you know. Like whether people who grew up getting trophies for just showing up never learned how to actually earn anything, so they just coast on other people's work and nobody calls it out because we are all supposed to celebrate effort over results now.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, that might be true, but also you don't know what her life is like or what she's been through or what she's learned. It's super annoying to get passed up for nepotism like that. I can certainly agree with you. And I also agree with you that most people are stupid and lazy. That's been my experience, but you still can't know what's gone on in their lives or what they've done or what they're good at.
|
||||
|
||||
STACY: Okay, yeah, you're right. I don't know her whole story.
|
||||
|
||||
STACY: But Luke, I do know that I spent six months teaching her how to do intake paperwork, how to talk to patients who come in scared or angry, how to handle the insurance verification system that crashes twice a shift. And now she's my supervisor making probably 15,000 more than me because her mom works upstairs. That part, I do know. And maybe she's great at other things, but the stuff she's doing now...
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Hey, I understand and can sympathize with you, and I think everybody's been in that situation at least once in their life. So, yeah, you just kind of got to deal with it, and if you're feeling underappreciated at your job, you might have to find a new job. Maybe one where your mother's the supervisor, and she can help you out climb in the ladder.
|
||||
|
||||
STACY: Yeah. Well, my mom's been dead for eight years, so that's not happening. But okay, Maybe I need to find a new job. Except, my sister Crystal actually did that. She moved to Portland last year and quit her job at the hospital because her manager was toxic. And now she posts these long Instagram things about boundaries and unlearning resilience, which I'm pretty sure is just code for giving up when things get hard.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, I can't tell you what those things mean, but they do seem pretty nonsensical and silly to me as well. out there doing what? What's her job? Is the Instagram her job?
|
||||
|
||||
STACY: No. She works at some wellness center doing intake or reception or something, which is basically what she did here, except now she makes less money and pays three times the rent. But she's honoring her truth or whatever. And look, I'm happy she's happy, I guess. But part of me wonders if she just ran away because she never learned to stick things out when they suck.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, I don't know. I run away all the time too, so I can certainly identify with that. But there's lots of reasons somebody might want to move. If her boss was toxic and she doesn't mind taking a pay cut to live somewhere where she can, I don't know, feel more at home or enjoy a different experience or have the stores and social life that she likes around and work with people that she enjoys being around, then good for her.
|
||||
|
||||
STACY: Okay, but here's the thing that's actually bothering me. My kids' teacher told me last year that I was too focused on winning when I got upset score at soccer games. She said I was teaching my daughter that her worth is tied to performance.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, do you think that worth is tied to performance?
|
||||
|
||||
STACY: I mean, yeah, kind of. Because what else is there? If you don't perform, if you don't show up and do the work better than the next person, then what? You just get participation trophies your whole life? And then someone's mom gives you a promotion. It's a good gig if you can get it.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Right, exactly. And that's what I'm saying. This girl at work, the supervisor's daughter, she literally has a participation trophy on her desk. Well, you know what I say? Here's my advice for you. If you can't beat them, join them. So go get yourself involved in something and participate. And maybe you'll get some trophies too. If you don't like your job, quit it and go find a new one. And if you're not getting moved up the ladder in the way that you feel like you should, then take some classes and work harder than everybody else. financial compensation generally one way to do that is to perform better than everybody else so uh if you're there there's something else here too if you're the best at doing something something right and it's like low level menial stuff nobody wants to do even if you're capable of doing much more at a much higher level if you're the one that's going to get the little stupid niggly shit done then they're going to keep you on that right because nobody else wants to do it so you can actually be too good at your job. You can be too effective and keep yourself down that way. So I don't know what to tell you here. Be shittier at your job, I guess, or find a new one where you can excel.
|
||||
|
||||
STACY: That actually makes sense. I never thought about it that way, but yeah, I'm the one who knows where everything is. I'm the one who fixes the scheduling screw-ups. I trained that girl on literally everything she's doing now. So maybe I made myself too useful right where I'm I am. But here's what really gets me.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Okay, well, we're going to have to go to a commercial break, so hurry up with what gets you.
|
||||
|
||||
STACY: My sister keeps posting about how I need to unlearn toxic resilience, and I keep wondering if she's actually onto something or if she just gave up. Like, is there actually a difference between knowing when to quit and just being soft?
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yes, there is. You quit when you feel like you don't want to do it anymore. That's all. If your goals change, if you're no longer aligned with what you're doing, you don't stick to doing something just because that's what you do. That's stubbornness, and it's not the same thing as growth.
|
||||
|
||||
STACY: Okay, but how do you know the difference? Because from where I'm standing, my sister left town posts these long captions about boundaries and self-care, and I'm still here working third shift covering for people. And maybe I'm the idiot, or maybe she just couldn't hack it. I genuinely don't know which one of us is doing it.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: right well you said that she is happy and you are not so it sounds to me like she's the one that's doing it right and and you should maybe take a lesson
|
||||
|
||||
STACY: I didn't say she was happy I said she posts about boundaries that's different she could be just as miserable in Portland just with better lighting for her Instagram photos
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: okay well you did say she was happy actually and now it's time for us to go to a word from our sponsors
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: All right. And here we go. We are back. Next up to the line, we've got a returning caller. I've seen this guy's name before. Here we've got Marvin. Marvin. Welcome back to the show. What's the update on your life?
|
||||
|
||||
MARVIN: Hey, Luke. So Sharon pulled Maya out of school. Just did it. Didn't even tell me until after she'd already submitted the withdrawal paperwork. I found out when Maya came home on Tuesday with all her stuff from her locker in a garbage bag.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: All right. Well, it sounds like that decision's been made for you. Is that causing problems with you and your wife?
|
||||
|
||||
MARVIN: Yeah, that's the thing, though. We had this massive blowout on Monday night, right? Like, really bad. And then tonight, another one.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, you're going to have to decide how much you want to hold on to this one, because it's been done. It sounds like you're already, you have to decide if you want to be right or you want to be happy.
|
||||
|
||||
MARVIN: I mean, I hear you. But here's what's actually happening. Maya's been home for three days now, and she's already back in her room all the time. Won't come out. Sharon's got this whole curriculum laid out, these workbooks. She's talking about socialization groups on Fridays. But Maya just sits there during the lesson staring at nothing. And Sharon keeps saying give it time. It's an adjustment period.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, give it some time. It is an adjustment period. And if you don't think it's going the way that you want it to get involved and see what you can do to encourage her to get the most out of it.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Even if you don't agree with it, you can still be a positive influence and try to make it work. Or you can just get pissed off all the time and fight with your wife and, complain about how it's not how things should be done. But it doesn't sound like you're doing anybody any favors by doing that.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: Okay, but here's the thing. Technically, Sharon didn't even follow the proper withdrawal procedure. The school district has a specific process, and she just called the principal and said Maya wasn't coming back. No paperwork, no meeting, nothing. I looked it up, and now the school's calling, saying they can't just unenroll her like that.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, I don't think they can, just unenroll her like that. And if she misses too many days, then she's going to be in some kind of trouble. And I mean, if that's the case, if she just pulled her out for no reason, it sounds like maybe your wife might be the problem. And I don't really know how to help you there other than to, is she on any medication? Does she have any behavioral issues or something like that? Was she always like this?
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: No, she's not. I mean, Sharon's not crazy or anything. She's actually really methodical usually. That's what's weird about this. She researched homeschooling for months. She's got binders full of stuff.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, maybe you need to reframe this conversation instead of fighting over Maya being out of school and whether homeschooling is good or not, express concern for the way that she's acting about it because it seems out of character and it's not the right way to do things. So maybe if you approach this in a different way, you can get to the bottom of what's driving her, what's motivating this homeschool push, and maybe get her some help or at least understand what she's doing and help her yourself. Because if she really needs the kid to be out of school for whatever reason, you should know what that reason is. And I know it's difficult, but try and try and support her and help her do it the right way.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: That actually makes sense, because when I try to bring up Maya's friends or the social stuff, Sharon just shuts down completely, like won't even engage.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: It sounds like there's something going there that maybe you're not aware of, that some sort of trauma that happened to your wife that you don't understand, or Maya, that they don't want to tell you. There's something else going on there that isn't just education.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: Wait, hold on. You think something happened to Maya at school? Like something specific? Because Sharon kept saying Maya was anxious, but Maya never actually said she didn't want to go to school.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Oh, no, I'm not saying something specific happened to Maya. I'm saying of, you don't know. More likely, what I would think is something happened to your wife when she was in school that she's remembering now that had traumatized her and she's trying to protect Maya from that memory. But I don't know. I'm not a psychologist. I would just try and approach it from that way and figure out where the motivation is coming from.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: Oh, yeah. Actually, Sharon's mom pulled her out of school in 10th grade. I forgot about that. She had to get her GED because her mom her the last two years, and Sharon always said it was the worst thing that ever happened to her. She missed prom, all of it.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, something's going on and you need to get to the bottom of it and I don't have any advice for you or hear a specific question here. So I'm going to recommend that you to talk to your wife and figure out why this is happening, whether that's something that's going on with Sharon or something that's going on with Maya or just to understand the why, because it's not causing conflict at home, it's serious enough that it's causing conflict at home, right? And she's doing unreasonable stuff that's going to get the kid in trouble, and that's not okay. So if you care, then express care and find out what's going on.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: You're right. I've been so focused on being right about the homeschooling thing that I didn't even think about why she's doing the exact thing she said ruined her teenage years. That's actually insane when you say it out loud.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, it kind of is, and it makes you think that there's an extenuating circumstance there that isn't being articulated. so get to the bottom of what that is, all right, and give us a call back and let us know.
|
||||
|
||||
CALLER: I will. I'm going to talk to her tomorrow, or actually, when she gets back. I really appreciate it.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: All right, buddy, good luck, too. Good luck, too. Hopefully this isn't her negatively when it doesn't need to. Next up, we've got Rocco. Rocko's another returning call. Welcome back to the show. What's going on? You got an update for us, buddy?
|
||||
|
||||
ROCCO: Hey, Luke. Yeah, I'm here. Thanks for taking my call again. I'm on my break at the Pizza Hut. Got about 15 minutes before I got to clock back in.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: All right, so what are you calling for?
|
||||
|
||||
ROCCO: So, uh, remember last time I called? I was all twisted up about getting stuck in that elevator with Linda and Dale, my ex-wife and her boyfriend? Well, I did what you said. I went home. I appreciated Sharon. I put that whole thing. I put that whole thing out of my mind.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Apparently you didn't if you're calling back into a radio show about it again.
|
||||
|
||||
ROCCO: Yeah, okay, fair point. So here's the thing. Last Sunday, my mom calls like she always does, and she's going on about how she ran into Linda at the grocery store. And Linda told her that she and Dale broke up, like three weeks ago.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Look, man, you got to figure out which one of these chicks you want to be with because it's not a good use of our time here on the radio show. So my advice to you is to decide and stop messing around with the other one.
|
||||
|
||||
ROCCO: Wait. No, no, no. I'm not messing around with anybody. I haven't even talked to Linda. I'm still with Sharon. Everything's fine there. I'm just saying when my mom told me that, something in my chest just...
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, if you've got something to say to us, then say it, because I don't really have the time to drag it out of you.
|
||||
|
||||
ROCCO: All right. All right. So I looked up Linda's number. I still had it in my phone from...
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Good for you. Get a life. Next up we've got Brandy. Brandy. Welcome to the show. What's going on in your life?
|
||||
|
||||
BRANDY: Luke, hey. So I got offered a partnership today, and I need to figure out if I'm about to become a business owner or just really good at ruining friendships. My best friend Cass wants to start a PI firm together. She's got the license and $60,000. I've got 20 years chasing down bail jumpers and a name that actually means something around here.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Okay, congratulations. It sounds like an exciting opportunity, and I hope it works well for you. What's the problem? This sounds like sounds like something to be excited about.
|
||||
|
||||
BRANDY: Yeah, see, that's what I keep telling myself. Except my sister Natalie already burned through two family businesses, like Sherman through Georgia. First one was a catering thing with our cousin. Second was some boutique situation with our aunt. And both times it was the same story. Money runs out. Friendships already dead. And Natalie's posting Instagram stories from Sedona, talking about fresh starts while everyone else is still paying off the debt. And here's the thing. Cass wants an answer by Saturday, like 48 hours, to decide if I'm going to risk the best friendship I've got on whether we can make it past here too without wanting to kill each other.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, that's tough when you're working with any friend, even if you're not going into business together, but just working together. It depends on your friendship and your personalities and how much this means to you. Maybe it's not the best use of your skills or time. But think about that. I mean, I can't tell you what's right or wrong there.
|
||||
|
||||
BRANDY: Right. No, I get that. And honestly, the work part doesn't scare me. Like Cass and I have been talking about this hypothetically for years, we know how we'd split it. She handles the corporate stuff, background checks, insurance fraud.
|
||||
|
||||
BRANDY: I take the skips and the messy domestic cases. Yeah, well, you also have to have the conversation about what's going to happen when this and write all that out in contracts. Who gets what? Are there any company vehicles? How is the friendship going to continue if the business goes south? Like, you can have those conversations before you even start and have them written down. And that way, nobody has any, um, any surprises when things go awry, if things go awry. Because they might also be wildly successful. You don't know unless you try.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah. That's the smart move, I know.
|
||||
|
||||
BRANDY: Get it all in writing, worst case scenario on paper before we even sign the lease. Cass actually brought that up. She's got a lawyer friend who does partnership agreements. But here's what's eating me. And I heard Stacy earlier talking about her sister and the toxic resilience thing. And I felt like she was reading my mail.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, well, we all see like a hundred of those things a day. So, I mean, she's reading everybody's mail.
|
||||
|
||||
BRANDY: Right. But what got me was, am I being smart and careful? or am I just doing what I always do? Because Natalie left. She bailed on the family stuff, moved to Sedona, posts about boundaries and healing and all that, and everyone acts like she's the screw-up. But she's out there taking risks, starting over, and I'm still here in the same office I've worked out of for 15 years, tracking down the same dead beats, telling myself I'm being responsible. And now I've got an actual shot at something bigger, and my first instinct is to list all the ways it could in my face. Like, maybe Natalie is not the cautionary tale.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Yeah, you can't look at what somebody else's life is like and compare yours to it because everything about you is different. Your work is different. Your personality is different. Your goals are different. Your dreams are different. So you have to decide for yourself. If you want to take that risk, are you a risk taker? Do you want to work for yourself? Some people don't. And that's okay. If you do, though, if it then go for it. What's the worst that could happen? Is you and your friend don't talk anymore and you have to get a new friend? It happens anyway. It could happen whether you go into business or not. You don't know. So you can't project the records of the future. You just have to make the best decision you can with the information that you have today. If you get along with her and it sounds like she's doing the right things and approaching this the right way, she's got the backing, she's got the money, she's got the lawyer. It doesn't sound like, like, like, she's a hack. So if this is something that you could see yourself getting behind, if you can, if you can picture yourself doing this years from now, then go for it.
|
||||
|
||||
BRANDY: You're right. And I can picture it. That's the thing that's been keeping me up. I can see the office. I can see our names on the door. I can see us actually making this work. Cass isn't Natalie and I'm not my aunt or my cousin who got burned. We've been friends for 12 years. We've seen each and all the stuff that actually tests people.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, there you go. It sounds like you've got enough reasons to go for it. And the only reason to not go for it is the security in where you're at. And it's okay if you want to stay with that security where you get the same paycheck from a company that, you know, gives you set hours. Running your own company is a very different thing. And you have to be into it. You have to be all in or it's not going to work. So if you can picture yourself being all in, if that gets you excited and, uh, and, and, you have to be into it. You have to be all in. You have to be all in. And, uh, and, and, you have to, you have to be in. You have to, you. You have to You like your partner and she knows what she's doing. I don't see a problem either way. Whichever one makes you most excited, do that.
|
||||
|
||||
BRANDY: Yeah, you know what? You're right. The security thing is just fear dressed up as responsibility. I've been tracking skips for 20 years. Half those people are running from decisions they were too scared to make when it mattered. And here I am doing the same thing just with better excuses.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Well, Mazel tov, it sounds like you've got a new business opportunity. Congratulations. I hope it works out well for you.
|
||||
|
||||
BRANDY: Thanks, Luke. I'm going to call the cast tomorrow morning. Not going to wait until Saturday, just going to tell her I'm in. Worst case, I end up back where I started. Best case, we build something that's actually ours.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Very good. Congratulations. I'm happy for you. And I hope that it is a resounding success. And ladies and gentlemen, thanks for tuning in again. This has been another great episode of Luke at the roost. And we'll talk to you tomorrow. Thanks.
|
||||
@@ -242,8 +242,7 @@ RICK: Oh, man, that's got to be fake. Anti-terrorism training town? That sounds
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: Oh, well, you're correct. That is fake. But the anti-terrorism training town is real. Plius is really an anti-terrorism training town. It's the realistic villagers part that was false. So thank you for the call. I wish you the best of luck. And now we've got to go to our sponsors.
|
||||
|
||||
[Sponsor read]
|
||||
This episode is brought to you by Nail Nosh, the meal kit for people who've given up, but still need to eat something. Look, we're not going to promise that it'll change your life. You're still going to die alone. But at least you can spend your remaining Tuesday evenings chopping vegetables you can't pronounce. Each box contains three meals that take 45 minutes to make when they could have taken eight, because suffering is the only authentic human experience. This week's menu, Harissa Glazed Despair with Quinoa, pan-seared regret over Arugula, and our customer favorite, chicken thighs, with preserved lemon and unprocessed trauma. Use code void at checkout for 15% off your first box. That's code void because we're all just screaming into one. Nail Nosh, you got to eat something, might as well be complicated.
|
||||
LUKE: This episode is brought to you by Nail Nosh, the meal kit for people who've given up, but still need to eat something. Look, we're not going to promise that it'll change your life. You're still going to die alone. But at least you can spend your remaining Tuesday evenings chopping vegetables you can't pronounce. Each box contains three meals that take 45 minutes to make when they could have taken eight, because suffering is the only authentic human experience. This week's menu, Harissa Glazed Despair with Quinoa, pan-seared regret over Arugula, and our customer favorite, chicken thighs, with preserved lemon and unprocessed trauma. Use code void at checkout for 15% off your first box. That's code void because we're all just screaming into one. Nail Nosh, you got to eat something, might as well be complicated.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: OK, welcome to the show, Monique. Monique, you've reached a look at the roost and we're playing a game today. We're playing Real News or Fake News. I'm going to read you the headline of an article, and you tell me if it is Real News or Fake News. And here is your headline. Ready? Animus population drops to just 77 residents down nearly 40% since the 2020 census.
|
||||
|
||||
@@ -279,8 +278,7 @@ JEROME: Real. That's real news. I just read about that the other day that trying
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: That's it, sir. You are correct, very well done. And since we took a long time last time, we're going to have to go to another one of our sponsors.
|
||||
|
||||
[Sponsor read]
|
||||
Let's talk about mental health. Specifically, let's talk about brutal honesty. The therapy app that's tired of your shit. Unlike other apps with their calming voices and gentle affirmations, brutal honesty pairs you with an AI therapist that tells you what your friends are too nice to say. Did you try journaling about it? No, we're not doing that. Our algorithm analyzes your patterns and asks questions like, why do you think you deserve to feel better when you don't even drink water? And is your anxiety real or did you just have four cold brews on an empty stomach? Brutal honesty, because coddling yourself got you here. First session is free, but it will hurt your feelings. Use code growup at checkout. Brutal honesty, the app that blocks itself if you don't do the work.
|
||||
LUKE: Let's talk about mental health. Specifically, let's talk about brutal honesty. The therapy app that's tired of your shit. Unlike other apps with their calming voices and gentle affirmations, brutal honesty pairs you with an AI therapist that tells you what your friends are too nice to say. Did you try journaling about it? No, we're not doing that. Our algorithm analyzes your patterns and asks questions like, why do you think you deserve to feel better when you don't even drink water? And is your anxiety real or did you just have four cold brews on an empty stomach? Brutal honesty, because coddling yourself got you here. First session is free, but it will hurt your feelings. Use code growup at checkout. Brutal honesty, the app that blocks itself if you don't do the work.
|
||||
|
||||
LUKE: OK, brutal honesty, I should use that myself. Next up to the show, you're our last caller, Jasmine. Jasmine, we're playing real or fake news today. And I've got an article for you. Are you ready for it?
|
||||
|
||||
|
||||
Reference in New Issue
Block a user